Saturday, July 2, 2011

Im Home

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, and who have been called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28
 Coming here I knew I was about to have my world shaken up, my heart stolen, my mind blown, and my faith become deeper than it ever has been. My experience so far has reached all of those things and so much more. I prayed to God before I stepped foot through those gates. I prayed that my feelings would be Gods feelings, my thoughts His thoughts, and my words His words. And as soon as those gates opened and I saw the kids praising God, I felt the Lord say to me, “Welcome home.” It’s hard to describe how I feel here because I have nothing to compare it to. Its beyond anything I’ve ever experience, its beyond my imagination, and its more than I could have ever dreamed of or prayed for. I feel like the women here have been my older sisters my whole life, they are truly my angels send from God. And the children here, I can’t begin to even describe the beauty, the joy, the love, and the happiness they bring to me.

The other day something just didn’t feel right to me about leaving after a week. But I kept my mouth shut and just asked the Lord to do what He wants me to do. That night I got a phone call from Karris telling me that the Lord has been speaking to her heart saying, “She is worth investing in.” She really felt the Lord speaking through her about my time and my mission here, so she asked me to stay longer in Haiti. And of course I am! This is where I am supposed to be, this was a part of the perfect picture God has painted out for my life. So now I am staying in the girls house! So there will be lots of dance parties, movie nights, and late night talks. I am so blessed. Last night I went down to share a part of my heart, and pray for them. As I was walking down the stairs I could here them at the top of their lungs singing to Jesus and lifting His name up. It was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard in my life. They all have stories. Most have been abandoned. Some of them were found covered in feces, one was found in a trashcan. Two of the sisters watched their own father being murdered. This one beautiful girl was raped when she was 4 years old and her step mom would burn her all over with a hot iron.  She took a burnt spoon and would put it on her lips. Even though she has burns on her face, her mouth and her head, she is one of the most beautiful girls I’ve ever seen in my life. These girls have scars, some you can see physically, and some you cant. But they all have them in their hearts. It’s amazing to witness Gods hand at work as He heals them, and binds up their wounds.  As I prayed over all of them last night, I felt the Lords arms just holding that entire room. I heard Him say to me, “This is what I have sent you to do.
In Haiti, you don’t live for yourself you live for others. Your days aren’t filled with asking yourself, “what do I want to do today?” or “What am I going to wear, or eat or who am I going to hang out with?” But it’s, “how am I going to serve, who’s life am I going to change, who can I help…who can I bring home?” Your day is filled with giving others life. Bringing them hope, coming together in prayer, and through all of that, praising God.  Some people would come here and think I’m crazy for calling this my home. There is no air conditioning most of the time, there’s no hot showers, gourmet meals, or shopping malls, and yes, you are always sweating; but I’ve learned, its not about myself, its about God. And He is so present in Haiti. I’ve never been so close to Jesus in my life! It’s not about seeing how you can serve yourself, but its about sacrificing everything you have so you can serve others through the Lord. People are happier here, than in the states. And it’s because the only thing they run to in their life is Jesus. He is their absolute everything. He clothes them, He holds them, He provides for them, He heals them and He adores them. They have so much joy to share and they have so much to offer in this life. I’ve never been so happy. Thank you God for everything you have brought into my life... I’m home. 

1 comment:

  1. this makes me cry..thoday in church I thought of how upset I was to tell you tat you couldn't go to Uganda- and all the while ..god had other plans. its a wonderful lesson in trusting Him..letting Him lead us in the directions- and not ignoring His voice. I felt convicted that you shouldn't go to Uganda..and now I know why. How wonderful it would have been if I had been more trusting that He would provide a special opportunity for you somehwhere else- and that even when we have to wait- and we feel disappointed -to know that God has plans to prosper us- plans for His glory..
    I love you my precious girl. I am so veyr proud of you-
    Mom

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